Farewell With Grace Program
How to prepare yourself for your loved one’s end of life experience –
practically, emotionally and spiritually
At the end of this program you will know what you need to know, before you need to know it.
Online via Zoom
Friday May 26, 2023
9.30am – 4pm
Your elders are getting older.
We like to think that they are invincible, that they’ll be around forever, yet we know that they won’t.
You want to make sure that the process will be as easy as possible, but you have no idea where to start.
You haven’t experienced any of this before and honestly, you feel overwhelmed at the thought of it all:
- Who decides what happens if they can’t talk?
- What would they like at their funeral?
- Do they have choice around where they die?
- What do you do once they’ve died?
- How will you cope?
- What does dying look like? Is it scary?
It’s all too much.
So you stop thinking about it. You’ll find out what you need to know when it gets closer. Right?
Does any of this sound familiar?
I get that you may not want to think about this stuff, it’s sad to think about your elders not being around, that it can be scary, that it can be overwhelming…and maybe with thinking about your elder’s end of life it may put your own mortality in your face?
But you know what, avoiding this topic won’t make it easier.
Because I had had the sessions with Sharon, I was prepared, and I was strong and in my power about what my Mum needed and wanted in the final days and hours of her life.
It’s a really hard time, but Sharon really helped me to be ready, and it helped me to handle it.
Thank you Sharon for helping me to have the strength to be able to enjoy the last precious days with my darling Mum.
KW
You won’t just magically know everything you need to know when the time arrives. You may have heard the saying, “Failing to plan is planning to fail.” We plan holidays, weekends away, family celebrations, wedding etc, yet how much do we plan for end of life? This is a time of life where planning can make a significant difference to the quality of the experience for all involved.
That’s why I’m here to help you.
I’ve created an online workshop on the basics that you need to know.
We look at the practical, the emotional and the spiritual aspects to help you make the most of your elders’ end of life experience.
Now before you get scared, I promise you there will be laughs, yes, laughs.
It’s not all heavy and sad – there can be joy and laughter too.
There could also be tears. Who am I kidding? Yes, there will be tears, and it’s a fair chance mine will be in there too.
This workshop series will equip you with some basic information to help you start to navigate the challenges that come with ageing elders.
The program is about helping you make the most of this truly precious time.
This program will help you know what you need to know, before you need to know it, which is actually REALLY important. When you are sharing the end of journey of someone precious in your life, as well as doing all the normal things in your life, there’s not much more information you can take in.
By learning this information BEFORE you need it, you’ll be amazed how many little nuggets of gold you will recall when you need to know them.
We will answer these questions and more…
- What are the documents for end of life?
- Where can my loved one be for the end of their life?
- What are the signs and symptoms of end of life?
- What happens to their physical remains?
- How can I celebrate the life of my loved one?
- How do I cope with my loved one dying?
- How do we handle family disputes?
- How do we talk to our kids/grandkids?
- How can I say goodbye when I can’t be there?
- How do I find out what my elders want?
End of life is something that will happen for all of us – hopefully later rather than sooner.
By doing this program, you will be able to focus on enjoying the time with your elders, creating precious memories to treasure, and not worrying about what has to happen when the time comes.
You can relax knowing that you are prepared.
You gave me all the practical skills and understanding I needed to support and help my darling Ken when he was diagnosed with very aggressive cancer last year. We both benefitted so much from the things you taught me.
Through you I gained the confidence to speak up on Ken’s behalf to doctors, family members and medical staff.
Ken had the peaceful death he wanted because you enabled and educated me (and Ken through me) to ensure this.
Kathy Mildred
I met the beautiful Sharon a few years back and was instantly taken by her authenticity.
Recently she reached out to me after hearing about my dad and her wisdom, knowledge, understanding and connectedness has made this chapter in my life so much easier.
She is across it all … tying up loose ends, clauses for documents and most of all love.
MH
Why Do I Need To Know This Stuff?
In my work with loved one’s of people who are at the end their life, there is one major focus of the work – Helping you to avoid regret as part of your grieving experience.
Too many times I’ve heard people say:
- I wish I’d done this
- I wish I’d said that
- I wish we had known what they wanted
- I didn’t know that we could have done that
- It would have been so much easier if we had have known that
You will grieve your loved one – that comes because you loved them. But you don’t need to feel regret and regret makes your grief a squillion times harder.
By giving you some basic understandings around some of what is involved with end of life, you are taking a a massive step forward toward avoiding regret.
It will also enable you to be more present, to focus on making the most of a crappy time and creating precious memories for you to treasure, instead of scrambling to understand what’s going on.
Avoid Family Fights
There’s another reason to do this course – you want to avoid family drama and fights. This is even more important when you think of the number of families these days that are blended. Having the documentation in place, roles clearly defined and an understanding of what happens can DRAMATICALLY lessen the chances of family disputes.
One lady shared with me that when her husband was dying, their four sons all had differing beliefs about what their dad wanted. Consequently, there were disagreements, and fights and instead of being able to focus on her husband and herself, she had to play referee. Thankfully, her husband had completed advance care planning documentation which stipulated exactly what he did and didn’t want. She was so deeply thankful as it stopped all the fights immediately.
What will I learn?
That’s a great question!! I wanted to ensure that the sessions are comprehensive and not overwhelming all at the same time. Below are some of the topics we cover:
The Practical…
- How to have THE Conversation
- Paperwork Involved
- Locations to Consider
- After Death Care
- Remains Options
The Emotional…
- Preparatory Grief
- Resolving Unresolved Issues
- Talking With and Involving Mini Humans
- Self Care
- Family Issues
- When You Can’t Be There
The Spiritual…
- What’s Most Important – To You and Them
- What Does a Good Death Look Like?
- Rituals/Ceremonies
- Being Fully PRESENT
The End of Life…
- Signs and Symptoms
- Expected vs Unexpected
- Making the Most of This Time
- Holding Sacred Space
I have been guiding professionals and individuals through this and similar information since 2016. Time and again people have said how valuable it is and more importantly, how much it made a difference to them and the end of life journey with their loved one. That’s the singular aim.
I invite you to become one of those people by investing in this program.
Your Investment:
The workshop will be held on Zoom, recorded and then the recording sent to you so that you can refer back to it at any time.
This price is per individual. If you wish to do the workshop at the same time with a significant other/sibling etc, please contact me for a special price.
If you have a small group that would like to do this workshop, please contact me and we can discuss your needs further.
$555.00
Prefer to learn this content privately?
If you and a significant other/sibling would like to cover this information 1:1 with me, we can. This would ensure that we can focus solely on you. The workshop an be held over multiple sessions, at times that would for us all. The cost for doing this workshop 1:1 is $995.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is this program for me?
This is basic information, designed for people who know very little or nothing about end of life. This is the basis from which the content will be presented. It is designed to give you some information that will help you understand all that is involved without overwhelming you.
I don't want to think about it...
I get that, totally. The reality is though that we are all going to die. As much as we might want them to be, the precious elders in our lives are not immortal. This workshop series will help you be prepared and to know how to make the most of that precious time, so you are left with precious memories and not regrets that will haunt you.
My elders don't want to talk about it, so what's the point?
I hear you. In this workshop, you will learn ways to start having that conversation. And even if you can never do that, and I know some elders who refused to their dying breath, YOU can still be as prepared as possible with knowing what to expect. That will make the experience easier for you.
I have an elder with a terminal illness. Will this program help me?
If you have an elder who is estimated to be in the last 3 months of their life, please carefully consider whether this is the right program and time for you. I know from personal experience and observing clients that when you are in this space, you have very limited capacity for taking in new information. There’s a helluva lot going on for you that needs your focus. I’m not going to stop you, I simply ask you to deeply consider what is right for you. And of course, if you are wanting/needing some assistance coping with everything, I’m here to help and support you. My end of life counselling may be a more appropriate option for you.
Why did you create this program?
In my work with loved one’s of people who are at the end their life, there is one major focus of the work – Helping you to avoid regret as part of your grieving experience.
Too many times I’ve heard people say:
- I wish I’d done this
- I wish I’d said that
- I wish we had known what they wanted
- I didn’t know that we could have done that
- It would have been so much easier if we had have known that
You will grieve your loved one – that comes because you loved them. But you don’t need to feel regret and regret makes your grief a squillion times harder.
I don't think I have time for this...
I totally get that time is a precious commodity. I would simply encourage you to consider how important this is for you – only you can decide this. I do know from both my own experience and what other people have shared with me how much they wished they knew some of this information earlier.
If the day/date is the concern, get in touch and let’s see if we can work out a way for us to work together in a way that works for both of us.
How is the program delivered?
I use Zoom. You will also receive replays of the workshop so that you can refer back to the information at any time.
About Your Host
Hi, I’m Sharon Tregoning and I get it. Before my Dad died, when I was 30, I knew pretty much nothing about this stuff. By the time Mum died 13yrs later, I knew a fair bit more as there’d been a number of other deaths in our family, including my only sister, but there was still stuff I wish I had known beforehand…
- I didn’t know that I’d have to stand up to a doctor to get Mum’s wishes honoured
- I didn’t know that Mum would be angry with me and all sweetness and light with other people
- I didn’t know that Mum would be unconscious and at death’s door one day and sitting up and giving orders the next day
- I didn’t know that I could have washed my Mum one last time
- I didn’t know that there was a time limit for when Mum’s things had to be out of her unit
And this just scrapes the surface of the things I wish I had known and what I now know.
That was 2013. In the years since then, my work has almost exclusively been in the end of life space. I have worked in the following roles, some for a short time, some for a long time:
- Spiritual Counsellor
- Specialist Trainer
- End of Life Doula
- End of Life Celebrant
- Funeral Director/Arranger
- Holistic Mortician
- Staffed an Information and Support Line for Palliative Care Queensland
- Support Group Facilitator
- Published Author
Through all of these roles and with all the people that I have served, I have learned something new every single time.
I’ve also become more aware that for a lot of people, this is a whole new world and they have no idea where to start, what they need to know or how to have the conversation with their parents.
That’s why I’m here to help you and why I created this program. I walk beside you, guiding you gently so you can be as prepared as possible.
I look forward to seeing you on the inside.